When
given an opportunity to describe my relationship with my parents at a young age
I immediately thought, “This will be a cake walk” but when I proceeded to try
to describe our relationship with 5 adjectives it was a struggle. I believe that we automatically progress to a position of
describing where our relationship is currently located with our parents or what our parents
represent. For me, those are both extremely easy to describe. Before starting this class I was completely unaware of the AAI or what its purpose was and how it affects our life.
“The
Adult Attachment Interview (AAI), from which an individual’s current state of
mind regarding childhood experiences with care givers is inferred from a semi-structured
interview.(Roisman, 2007, 679)” Once
I finally decided what my 5 adjectives were that described my relationship with
them I had an extremely hard time giving exact examples to describe those
adjectives. I knew exactly who my parents were and what they represented as
people but my memory of my younger days was substantially clouded. “Much
of the social-psychological research on attachment is guided by a variant of
the classic diathesis–stress model in which working models of attachment are
assumed to influence attachment-related behavior primarily under conditions of
stress or threat. (Roisman, 2007, 679” I think before completing this interview
I was unaware of the idea that I may have had circumstances or instances in my
life that have changed or developed my attachment style. For myself, I assume
that I am perfectly fine and nothing is holding me back or restraining me but
as I learn more and more in this course I think I have realized that in my own
life there have been circumstances and instances that have caused me to put up
walls and struggle through certain situations. I never realized that I actually
have been affected by specific events and that there are some things that
I may need to reevaluate in my own life.
In this stage of life
that I am currently in I am at a point where I am making my own decisions on what I believe in and how I want to live my life. When I look back on how I was raised and how I was affected by a specific tragic event I am so grateful for my family and their support and for my Heavenly Father guiding me and protecting me. Some of life's struggles may be perceived as negative trials but they all formed me into who I am today, what I believe in, who
I love, and how I serve. I never really realized that anything we covered in class
could pertain to me or change my outlook on life. But somehow
there has been something specific in every class that I could relate too, that has challenged me, and that has made me go away contemplating how I could better myself or others.
References
Thanks so much for sharing your experience with the AAI. I would agree with you that I, at first, found myself defaulting to wanting to describe my parents as how my relationship is with them today, rather than the specific memories of childhood. I only wish that during prenatal classes future parents are educated on how impactful those formative years are in development attachment styles in adulthood. I wonder if that would change how many people parent their children if they truly understood that great impact?
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate in the AAI. As I thought back to my childhood, I thought that the interview would be a walk in the park. Yet when we actually started to describe our parents and try to recall memories, there were a few that I actually had trouble with. I like what you said about going through the course and relating it to past events in your life. For me, I have been able to look at things such as the AAI and have tried to figure out how such events, past or present have shaped or will shape my life and my development. I believe that we can use lots of information to not only apply to our future clients, but can also see how the information relates to our own lives and in turn be able to work out necessary problems that may arise. Thank you for sharing and being honest about your experiences.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing your experience Emily. I was definitely in the same boat as you in terms of thinking the AAI interview would be an easy task to accomplish, especially since I have such strong relationships with both of my parents. Likewise, I also had a somewhat difficult time coming up with specific memories from such a young age. At some points I found myself explaining memories that were from more recent years as opposed to childhood memories. I love how you mentioned your thankfulness and gratefulness for your parents and their support, as well as your Savior Jesus Christ. It sounds as though you enjoyed your AAI experience as much as I did.
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